How to gain momentum when you’re stuck – again

How to gain momentum when you’re stuck in bitterness – again How am I here – again? The one-word question I’ve asked myself a zillion times after I think I’ve turned a corner of bitterness. I’m at different places of forgiveness with people in my life. If you’ve joined me for all four parts of […]

The essential influence of trusted people in your forgiveness journey

The Essential Influence of Trusted People in Your Forgiveness Journey When I talk about people who have hurt me to others, my words spew out the hurt brewing in my heart. It’s not cute, trust me. In my forgiveness journey with my daughter’s dad, I noticed that talking about him with certain people would rile […]

How to communicate forgiveness without excusing hurtful behavior

How to communicate forgiveness without excusing hurtful behavior Events that cause our resentment often stay unspoken for a few reasons (as well as others): Fear of conflict Fear of the potential of conflict Not believing our value Fear of rejection We are afraid of the unknown and conflict is the ultimate unknown. Before conflict is […]

(RE)set your thoughts and actions to break the cycle of bitterness

(RE)set your thoughts and actions to break the cycle of bitterness What no one tells you about forgiveness, is that each time you feel ready, you’ll be given a *really good* reason why you don’t want to. There is not just one profound moment where you choose to forgive. It’s both choosing to forgive generally all that […]

Overcoming Bitterness & Choosing Forgiveness

Unwavering Commitment to Forgiveness I know, I know, forgiving someone who hurt you can feel impossible. It’s as if the moment you’re open to the idea of forgiveness, something triggering inevitably follows, causing another wave of bitterness, *deep sigh*. I’ve been there – again AND again – riding the waves of hurt. I won’t sugarcoat […]

Identifying & Navigating Sexual Triggers

Once you identify your triggers there can be a hyper-awareness phase that follows. In this phase, triggers can feel overwhelming with no easy ways of deescalating them. I have been in this exact situation many times where something from my past resurfaces. In that moment, my body is vibrating with anxiety, my mind unable to […]

Intimacy Substitutes I Fell For

Every single human on the planet desires intimacy. So what is true intimacy? And why is it so hard to feel? Because, friend, it’s loads more than just sex. In fact, sex can flat out lack intimacy.Intimacy is a closeness.Closeness can happen physically like cuddling or intercourse. Emotionally through vulnerability and storytelling. Intellectually through riveting conversation. And spiritually as […]

Sharing Your Trauma Triggers with Your Partner

My hunch is you’re here because you realized your past may be impacting your present. What happened to you wasn’t okay, it was a big deal and it matters. I don’t know why it happened. What I do know is…

Well… That Didn’t Go Well

When your hurt isn’t help with compassion, how do you lean into your relationship while processing the invalidation?

Help! I’m Afraid of Intimacy

I was single for 4 years after my daughter’s dad left to go to college when we were both 17. To say I had a fear of being left is an understatement. Not just being left, but being abandoned. For the first 4 years after her dad, I bounced between being content and being afraid […]